It’s been quiet a while since I wrote something, been quiet sometime since I sharpened my pencil and scribbled some paragraphs about what I feel, so to speak. Writing has been my passion, my way of letting out the emotions that are all engulfed within the tresses of my heart. It’s just that life has so much in store for me nowadays that I never really took the time to sit down and let out what I feel… As I am typing now, I feel the adrenaline kick in and I am slowly rekindling the flame of my writing passion that has been left in the cold for a long time now.. Wow! I have almost forgotten how good it feels to just go and let it all out.. There is no better way of a release…
I’m kinda bored these past couple of days, I feel like the days are dragging and it seems like the days are longer that they’re supposed to be. Maybe because christmas is fast approaching and the kind of christmas that I am used to back at home, is not gonna happen here. ( Ofcourse, coz my family won’t be here to share the noche buena with me). Or it might be because I am just counting weeks to deliver the little life that has been growing inside of me for 33 weeks now. You know how it is when you can’t wait for something to come, you just feel like time is going soooo slow…
It would be fair to call me impatient for acting this way, and I know that it won’t be safe for my little princess to be born right now, atleast give it a couple more weeks for her lungs to develop fully. But please bear with me, I’m sure any mother, or mother to be out there knew and understands what I feel. To some, she might just look like a bump to my belly, the reason why I’m eating more than I am used to and sleeping all day, if I could.. And don’t even mention the weight gain please.. I know, it comes with the territory… But to me, she is a living being, a life.. You would never understand unless you feel the kicks and the acrobats in my belly… I feel it eversince she was only 18 weeks old, all the time of day until now, but I still didn’t get over it, would never get used to it.. Every flutter, every kick, every movement brings a smile to my face, a certain kind of joy that only a mommy would feel… A very wonderful gift. And to think that this is my second baby, I should have been used to it.. But I don’t think I would… Even if I have more kids to come..
It’s only a couple of weeks left, the nearer it comes, the more impatient I become. Not just me but big sister andrea as well.. She is as ready to be a big sister as one would imagine. Soon, Rob and I would have two little girls… Two little sweet voices that would fill up our house with laughter.. Two little ones that would ask me about boys later on.. OMG! Let’s not go to that yet, I wanna enjoy them being young and innocent for as long as I could..
As soon as Rob and I knew that we’re gonna have another girl, instead of a boy that he hopes for, we started to think about what we should name her.. We we’re hoping we would have a boy so bad that we just prepared a boy’s name in order not to jinx it, but God has another plan, and we’re happy to have another girl, don’t get us wrong.. We are just sentinels of our kids, it is God that has the final say. He is the one that gives us according to what He knows is good for us.
Anyway, let’s go back to the name game… Most knew that my mom lost the battle with cancer back in 1991, when I was at the tender age of 7. It’s been a long time but for a child, there’s no getting over it, there’s no replacement for a mom as you all know already. Even my kind-hearted, wonderful late mamaling (my grandma), who has been a mom to me and my siblings could not replace her. She was sugar and spice and everything nice, as one would describe her, but we still long for our real mom..
Before I get too emotional and start crying, (you know, pregnant women tends to cry about everything), I asked my husband, if it would be fine to name our baby after my late mom or grandma. Sweet as he is ( that’s why I married him.. lol), he agreed without haste. Naming our baby after her would keep her alive, if only in memories, especially to her grandchildren who aren’t lucky enough to meet her and be spoiled by her. To us, it’s a way of remembering her.
My mom’s name is Josephine which means God will increase… So my husband and I looked for a middle name that would go with it, I even bought a name book, just to make sure we get all the choices and it’s meaning.. Like my dad once said, you will grow up according to what name you were given at birth. I dunno if it’s true, but it won’t hurt to consider it. So after several days of going through names, we finally agreed on naming her Josephine Abby… Abby meaning the joy of the Father, referring to God the Father… The name Josephine Abby now means God will increase the joy of the Father… As well as a way of remembering my mom…
Time flies when you’re so engrossed with what you’re doing, this is one thing about writing that I love so much.. It just brings you to a different world, it just opens up your soul. There’s so much I wanna share but I have to put down my pencil for right now and give big sister a snack. I love writing but I love my daughter even more, and I would drop whatever I’m doing for her.. I would definitely write again.. It might be about something stupid or crazy, it just depends on what I feel ofcourse… As long as it comes from the heart, it’s all that matters… Atleast that’s what I thought writing was about, a peek to what you’re feeling inside..
I’m kinda bored these past couple of days, I feel like the days are dragging and it seems like the days are longer that they’re supposed to be. Maybe because christmas is fast approaching and the kind of christmas that I am used to back at home, is not gonna happen here. ( Ofcourse, coz my family won’t be here to share the noche buena with me). Or it might be because I am just counting weeks to deliver the little life that has been growing inside of me for 33 weeks now. You know how it is when you can’t wait for something to come, you just feel like time is going soooo slow…
It would be fair to call me impatient for acting this way, and I know that it won’t be safe for my little princess to be born right now, atleast give it a couple more weeks for her lungs to develop fully. But please bear with me, I’m sure any mother, or mother to be out there knew and understands what I feel. To some, she might just look like a bump to my belly, the reason why I’m eating more than I am used to and sleeping all day, if I could.. And don’t even mention the weight gain please.. I know, it comes with the territory… But to me, she is a living being, a life.. You would never understand unless you feel the kicks and the acrobats in my belly… I feel it eversince she was only 18 weeks old, all the time of day until now, but I still didn’t get over it, would never get used to it.. Every flutter, every kick, every movement brings a smile to my face, a certain kind of joy that only a mommy would feel… A very wonderful gift. And to think that this is my second baby, I should have been used to it.. But I don’t think I would… Even if I have more kids to come..
It’s only a couple of weeks left, the nearer it comes, the more impatient I become. Not just me but big sister andrea as well.. She is as ready to be a big sister as one would imagine. Soon, Rob and I would have two little girls… Two little sweet voices that would fill up our house with laughter.. Two little ones that would ask me about boys later on.. OMG! Let’s not go to that yet, I wanna enjoy them being young and innocent for as long as I could..
As soon as Rob and I knew that we’re gonna have another girl, instead of a boy that he hopes for, we started to think about what we should name her.. We we’re hoping we would have a boy so bad that we just prepared a boy’s name in order not to jinx it, but God has another plan, and we’re happy to have another girl, don’t get us wrong.. We are just sentinels of our kids, it is God that has the final say. He is the one that gives us according to what He knows is good for us.
Anyway, let’s go back to the name game… Most knew that my mom lost the battle with cancer back in 1991, when I was at the tender age of 7. It’s been a long time but for a child, there’s no getting over it, there’s no replacement for a mom as you all know already. Even my kind-hearted, wonderful late mamaling (my grandma), who has been a mom to me and my siblings could not replace her. She was sugar and spice and everything nice, as one would describe her, but we still long for our real mom..
Before I get too emotional and start crying, (you know, pregnant women tends to cry about everything), I asked my husband, if it would be fine to name our baby after my late mom or grandma. Sweet as he is ( that’s why I married him.. lol), he agreed without haste. Naming our baby after her would keep her alive, if only in memories, especially to her grandchildren who aren’t lucky enough to meet her and be spoiled by her. To us, it’s a way of remembering her.
My mom’s name is Josephine which means God will increase… So my husband and I looked for a middle name that would go with it, I even bought a name book, just to make sure we get all the choices and it’s meaning.. Like my dad once said, you will grow up according to what name you were given at birth. I dunno if it’s true, but it won’t hurt to consider it. So after several days of going through names, we finally agreed on naming her Josephine Abby… Abby meaning the joy of the Father, referring to God the Father… The name Josephine Abby now means God will increase the joy of the Father… As well as a way of remembering my mom…
Time flies when you’re so engrossed with what you’re doing, this is one thing about writing that I love so much.. It just brings you to a different world, it just opens up your soul. There’s so much I wanna share but I have to put down my pencil for right now and give big sister a snack. I love writing but I love my daughter even more, and I would drop whatever I’m doing for her.. I would definitely write again.. It might be about something stupid or crazy, it just depends on what I feel ofcourse… As long as it comes from the heart, it’s all that matters… Atleast that’s what I thought writing was about, a peek to what you’re feeling inside..
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